Why Marriage Can’t Be 50-50 And Has To Be 100-100

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If a couple gets a divorce and neither of the parties had a prenuptial agreement then every asset that couples has is added up and then divided in half. I understand that it is often more complicated than this but the reason I am bringing this up is to discuss the idea that we each own 50% of our marriages. I couldn’t tell you how many times I have had a discussion with a husband and when I bring up how they are to love and serve their wife they almost always come back at me with, “I do all […]

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An Open Letter To Ray Rice

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Dear Ray Rice, This isn’t the typical letter, status update, or any other form of gossip that you are facing today. I am not writing this letter to bash on you, but to instead extend grace. When I say “extend grace”, I in no way mean that I condone what you did to your wife, but I am saying that you are forgiven by two people. I read online that your wife has forgiven you, but as long as you repent and ask for forgiveness, God will forgive you as well. I don’t know your history and what type of […]

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An Urgent Reminder For Husbands

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There is a spiritual battle raging all around us. As Christian men and husbands, we would be fools to forget this fact as I believe many of us have done. I know I have. This is a battle for our minds, marriages, and ultimately our effectiveness for the gospel of Jesus Christ. We need to be aware now, more than ever and we need to be preparing ourselves so that we do not lose this battle. For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, […]

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My Wife Is Gone And Now I’m Lonely

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I can’t remember a time in my life when I have been this lonely. I’m sure there have been moments but none I can recall. I am a person that thrives around other people. Community fuels my heart and re energizes me. My definition of a great time is being surrounded with my wife and son and closest friends, eating and talking about nothing and everything. Throw a game of cards in the mix and I’m in heaven. For the first time in my life though I am experiencing a loneliness like never before. My wife has a few speaking […]

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Is Your Love Unreasonable?

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Throughout time, humans have elevated reason – our ability to rationalize and make judgement calls regarding good and bad decisions. In Aristotle’s Ethics he describes human beings as rational animals and identifies reason as a uniquely human characteristic. Our ability to justify and rationalize our decision-making is God-given. But dependence upon reason can also get in the way of God’s call for us to love unconditionally. Human reason is great, but God’s wisdom shames the wise (I Corinthians 1:27). Where we see only failure, He sees a future. Where we see destruction, He sees destiny. In the middle of our mess, He […]

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One Thing Your Marriage Needs

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Do you ever watch those southwest commercials that ends with the saying “wanna get away”? They are probably some of my favorite commercials. One reason being, they are hilarious. Second reason, aside from their brilliant marketing and trying to sell you that they’re the best, Southwest is right: sometimes we just gotta get away. It’s healthy to get away from; work, the kids, the dirty dishes, the laundry list, and LIFE. When was the last time that you took a vacation? I don’t mean Hawaii or Europe, because if we are thinking in that aspect, you may not always be […]

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So This Is What My Wife Feels When I Do This To Her.

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Some would say that Unveiled Wife and I are crazy for leaving our town for 28 days during the nicest month of the year with our 20 month old. We spent those days flying around the country landing in 6 different cities to visit her publisher as well as 3 conferences that she had been craving to go to for a couple years now. My wife and I are no strangers to traveling and actually really enjoy it; Africa, South America, Canada, 2 cross country road trips, up and down both coasts and handful of other little adventures. All this to say, […]

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Hang Up The Boxing Gloves in Your Marriage

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For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel’s, the same shall save it.” (Mark 8:35 KJV) Let’s Get Ready To Rumble!” Round One: Finances You and your wife enter the boxing ring regarding your monthly budget. You grab your gloves and she grabs hers. First punch comes from you, the husband. You say to your wife, “You are spending to much money! The things you buy are unnecessary. You’re always shopping! YOU need to scale back. That’s why we are short this month!” Pow! Every word spoken […]

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I Stopped Saying “I’m Sorry” To My Wife, And You Should Too

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Communication is an essential part of any successful relationship and marriage is no exception. Normally, I tend to recognize communication elements that I need to add to how I communicate with my wife. But sometimes, it’s just as important to recognize a bad habit and stop doing it. In this case, I have made a conscious decision to stop saying two words to my wife – I’m sorry. Words matter It’s easy to get lazy with your word choice. There’s a tendency to flippantly use words without consideration for what they really mean. In the 1987 romantic comedy, The Princess Bride, […]

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What I Learned From A Pre-Approved Credit Card

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When I got my first piece of mail as a married man, I was excited that it read “Mr. and Mrs. Michael Rochin”. I thought it was the coolest thing ever (even though it was just a “pre-approved” credit card) … but then fear struck me when I saw both of our names together because I realized something: I represent not only myself, but now my wife; every single action I do from now on will be a reflection of her. If I treat someone harshly, they can fairly assume that my wife is rude as well. If I gossip […]

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